Stork'd This is what happens if you go Skinny Dipping during Adult Swim at the Gene Pool.

Find more Safe Baby Handling Tips at Wry Baby.

Someone is turning two years old this week. I'm not naming any names, but I think she will make an outstanding older sister to someone due to arrive mid-March.

In about one week my wife, my 2-year-old daughter and our unborn child are going to get into my 12-year-old Jeep and drive 3,800 milles from Seattle to Maryland.

If you were wondering, the sound you are hearing is tufts of gray hair sprouting from my scalp like mold growing on bread, in an incubator, on a hot summer day, in MoldTown, USA.